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A4

Theale to: Christened Kneesliders

Head North East from Theale on the A4 and just before you get to Junction 12 of the M4 you'll come across a great, on-camber roundabout with a clear view of traffic from all directions. Warm up here but this one can be quite busy so take the right exit off and you'll find yourself at an Industrial Estate with two linked roundabouts which are perfect for first-time sliders. On a Sunday there is almost no traffic there, we saw three cars there in half an hour, one of which was a security patrol who seemed more than willing to turn a blind eye...


A505/B565/A507

Barton-le-Clay, Beds to: Newton, Essex

Join the A505 at Barton heading towards Hitchin and start with a maxed out straight half a mile climbing up to the first of the med/fast sweepers almost all of which are much faster than they look (where's your bottle ?) and half of which are blind so you can't resist going back and doing it again just to prove a point. Slow down going through the village of Hexton, which is a real shame cos it's really a chicane not a village, then pump it up hill, blind right, don't back off - it'll work. Take it easy on the red tarmac corner (decreasing radius) then basically hammer it all the way through a series of S-bends until it straightens out. Watch out for cars turning across your path here, the junction's on the crest/bend, then ignore the SLOW sign on the fast left, it lies (although you may meet a tractor cos there's a farm entrance, your call,)and slow down going through Hitchin. Turn right at the main roundabout towards Stevenage, round the bypass to another one and exit to the B565 Codicote (described well elsewhere but mistakenly called both the A656 and the A507)this is a good road, and it gets faster every time I ride it, most bends have +'ve cambers, visibility is good or at least you can see the line of the hedges ahead and there's that nice blend of enough cars to carve past and yet not so many that they get in the way. It's not exactly a race track, but all the corners are of the type that makes you feel you got it close to perfect. When you get to Codicote keep going to Welwyn, then bomb up the A1M for a couple of Junctions (I haven't found a better way - there are lanes but too narrow/slow for any fun, so best just get it over with) and join the A507 to Baldock and then on to Buntingford (described elsewhere) then go into Buntingford (Little Chef on your right) and take a left down the A1038 towards Quendon which is for the most part med/fast and twisty and seems to go on for ages once you're past the dogleg X-roads. Apparently there's a good road (A1060) from Bishops Stortford (2 mins from Quendon) too so God knows where you could end up. These roads aren't the ultimate dog's bollocks but this is Beds/Herts/Essex not Dartmoor or Buxton. I defy anyone to do this route without having a YEEE-HAH or three.


M271/A27/A3057/A343/

Southampton to: Newbury and Back

Approx 110 Miles. Some good coutry A Road twisties, steep hills and some good fast stuff. From Millbrook Roundabout, Southampton, take the M271 (worst road in Britain?) it's typical ripply concrete but its fast and fairly straight so makes a good warm up, but thankfully its short, it crosses the M27 at a large traffic light controlled r/about, at the end of the second bit bear left onto the A27. A nice stretch into Romsey, (can get busy). At Romsey head onto the A3057, a good twisty road but with a couple of 30 mph villages but good scenery and some great bends, (surface is OK).

Through Stockbridge and on towards Andover, again some villages but good fun and some fast sweepers. At Andover go through the ring road and out onto the A343 through some nice Urban national speedlimit dual cariageway. (HIGHWAY CODE ANYONE?) Good fast road, twisty and some very steep hills, eventually after Highclere you hit the infamous Newbury bypass section of the A34 head north 1 junction, its all u need (or want) anyway its the best bit of the new road, fast and steep/twisty (mind the wobble boxes). Join the A4, towards Hungerford, this is the old London to Bristol Road and it shows, its usually very quiet (M4 is much faster direct). The great thing about this section is the width, its genuinely 3 proper lanes wide, but as a single carriageway A road its just sweet for bikes you just ride the middle lane if theres anyone to overtake. Super Fast.

At Hungerford take the A338 towards Salisbury, its pretty twisty to start with but speeds up when u hit the upgraded section at Burbage. Mind the speed cameras in some of the 40 mph villages but its mostly well signed, seen plod here too. Loads of sweepers and good elevation changes for Hampshire.

At the A303 go under and at the r/about turn left then first right (B3084) towards Grately 30 mph village, at the railway station bear left signed Romsey Avoiding Low bridge, unclassified road but fast if unsighted, TT stylee, shortcut to A343 at Middle Wallop, at A343 turn right then quickly left (historic signs for Danebury Hillfort) this is A SUPERB STRETCH of road, 2 esses, both faster than u think, so so so fast along here and very good viz, very quiet, but at the end BEWARE, a very dirty farm both sides of the road, followed by a sharp off camber right/left and then a sharp stop at at give way (nice one this) give way sign, 75 Metres ! steep down hill stop at a very fast, dual carriageway, downhill bend on the A30, cheers Highways agency! take it easy here. Turn left, steep downhill, pootle through Stockbridge, plod, CHOICE here:

1= straight over up the stockbridge downs (B3049) to Winchester (traffic in the city centre) back to Southampton on the M3 throught the new by pass (Twyford down) which is a fun stretch when its not rammed, includes the tightest angle of bend allowed on a motorway. (alledgedly). or

2 =Turn right retrace your route on the A3057 to Romsey & Southampton. Just out of Stockbridge is a sweet bend on a hill combo, after Kings Somborne u WILL get stuck behind a slow car/van/bus I always do and you can't see anything due to the twisties and hedges, but if you wait there is a mile long straight when you drop out of the hill at Lower Brook, the record so far is 11 cars despatched along here . Easy though cos theres a long left sweeper at the end into a 40 with a pub on one side with cagers pulling in and out. Our local run this is and I've seen rideouts leaving from the Texaco station at Hungerford on a Sunday all the way through to Romsey, nice one lads, safe and tidy from what I saw. Enjoy and respect the villagers.


B3157

Weymouth to: Bridport

Cannot believe this isn't here already! 17 miles, 3 villages, no cameras, occaisional plod. The local boys do it in ~ 12 minutes. Leave Weymouth via Chickerell, long straight ~140 (abought 1/2 mile which IS a long straight on this road!!) dropping past the 'Knights in the Bottom' pub (crap but the patrons still like to pull out in front of you) sharp 70mph right at the top of the hill - watch out for campers pulling out of Bagwell Farm! A mile or so of undulating road under trees before a blind summit (about 120mph is just right if I recall) that goes slightly left as you land! Open 140mph+ road to Portesham with a slight jump if you hit it fast enough. The KingsArms is a fairly good pub to sit and listen to everyone else doing it while you debug your visor with a pint! There's a 90 degree left at the exit from the vilage, mind your head on the corner of the cottage! A 90mph off-camber right leads to another airborne moment on your way through to the next village. Watch out for horses as you approach the village of Abbottsbury. The road through this village is very narrow so if you've got a loud pipe, no point in keeping it to yourself HeHe!! A very long steep twisting climb out of the village (1st gear in a full car!) onto the high ground watchout for the muppets looking at the view on the way up to the high ground and for the next few miles!(actually worth stopping for a look once you've done this road 50 or 60 times!) There are several opportunities to get airborne before the long twisting descent into Burton Bradstock - Beware of the third in a series of humps, ifyou get it wrong it'll dump you on the bonnet of the oncoming car - it has happened sadly. There are several hidden exits on the long straight down past Cogden Beach, this is muppet country so keep the brakes covered, they all have 30 mph brains which can't compute bikes closing @ 140+. Sharp 90 mph right dropping down into the next village. Ease down into Burton Bradstock - there's a right turn where camper vans delight in taking three or four goes at, couple of opportunities for kneedown on the entry and exit from this village. Nail it out of the village watch out for the chicane in the midle, car drivers like to play 'after you, no after you' here! Two good corners here, nail it soon as your clear of the chicane and bang theright knee down as you exit the village loadsa room to set-up for the left although don't run wide, the oncoming loves to cut the corner! Be wary as you crest the hill past Freshwater (more bleedin' holiday maker Kamikaze's turning right in front of you)ease off and take the first left into West Bay. Several kiosks around the harbour all selling the usual chips 'n tea. I can't guarantee that anything hasn't changed on this route, lived there for 18 years and only moved away 2 years ago. It's the only thing I miss about Dorset!! Be very wary of the local Plod in and around Bridport - it's sticksville and they've got cock all else to do but give bikers a hard time - particularly Dougie Miners if he's still around - total Nob! Same goes for Dick Ferris in Weymouth - that bastard would nick his own granny!


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